Who am I?

Hi! My name is Alistair McKinnon

Who am I?

By the age of 24 I was married, a homeowner, in work as a professional, and life was going according to plan... and then... when I was 27 my dad took his own life... and I felt as though the rug had been pulled from under my feet. I started searching for a deeper meaning to life and began a very intensive personal development and spiritual unfolding process over more than 25 years which has lead me to a clearer sense of who I am. I explored a lot of spiritual teachings and through a spiritual group even became a teacher of programs on relationship, parenting and leadership.

But in 2004 and despite all the personal growth and teaching the relationship program, my marriage fell apart and I knew that I needed to find a new way to be in intimate relationship. I had not got to the bottom of what it takes to have a sustainable, enriching, mutually satisfying committed relationship.

By chance, in 2011 I encountered Compassionate - Nonviolent Commmunication (NVC) as created and taught by the late Marshall Rosenberg Ph.D. and it transformed the way I was living and brought much enjoyment of and connection with the people in my life. I did a foundation training in early 2011 and then embarked on an eight month journey with "Embodying NVC Consciousness" that is now headed up by Shari Elle and recently she has invited me to be a trainer of the program alongside her. The eight month program was a foundational piece of my capacity to stay in connection with the people I love and a critical piece in my journey to become a Certified Trainer with the Centre for Nonviolent Communication (CNVC) which I have achieved in 2017.

In the last four years I have also studied the art of "Focusing" a body focused self awareness process designed to release the inner blocks that keeps us from moving forward with life. In June 2017 I was certified as a teacher of Focusing. It gives me great pleasure to sit in Presence with others and guide them to connect to their own inner aliveness, heal their relationship with their inner critic and dissolve action blocks getting in the way of a fulfilling and enriching life.

In 2014, I discovered the work of Dr Susan Johnson - arguably the world's leading researcher on the subject of intimate relationship - and I began self-studying her work and applying it where I can, in the work that I do.

I am happy to say that I am now enjoying a deeply committed mutually rewarding intimate relationship with my partner. We celebrate an aliveness and intimacy that is always surprising and inviting the next level of unfolding from moment to moment. It's  not always predictable or comfortable - but it is rewarding knowing that we are forging something based in the sharing of what is really true for us.

I love to offer what I have learned from this lifetime of searching. I have real empathy for people who face challenges in their own intimate relationship. I want to help couples know they can live a more fulfilling life together, growing and evolving a happy, safe and loving relationship.

People from whom I have learned and who have influenced my work strongly are:

  • Shyam Bond
  • Eckhart Tolle - author of "A New Earth"
  • Adyshanti
  • Byron Katie - creator of "The Work"
  • The late Dr.Marshall Rosenberg Ph.D. - creator of "Nonviolent Communication"
  • Dr. Gene Gendlin Ph.D. - creator of "Focusing" and his students, Ann Weiser-Cornell of FocusingResources.com and Jo Kennedy of FocusingAustralia.com.
  • Dr. Susan Johnson Ph.D. - creator of "Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy"
  • Five dear friends on the NVC Journey, Karen Thompson-Anderson and CNVC Certified Trainers, Chez Scott, Linda Mia Mukti, Shari Elle and Dorset Campbell-Ross

I am based in the hinterland behind Byron Bay in a glorious rural setting with views to Mt Chincogan and Mt Warning, about 10 minutes to the ocean beach.  I enjoy to do "the Lighthouse" walk in Bryon, walk the long surf beach at Brunswick Heads and swim when the inspiration strikes! I travel to Melbourne on a regular basis (once a month as a minimum) to connect with work opportunities and my mother and adult children that live there. I use phone and Skype for client appointments and have clients all over Australia often in rural areas. I find phone and Skype just as effective in how I work as "in person" appointments.

Call me on (+61) 0412 98 88 44 to ask a question or book an appointment or click here to make contact via the website.


"...you took us from the war zone to the love zone..."