Conflict resolution in our intimate relationship is not easy...by definition. Being willing to resolve conflict usually requires us to face painful emotions and most of us have been deeply conditioned to avoid a painful emotion rather than face it.
Which is a bit ironic because conflict creates painful emotions and not resolving the conflict ensures that the painful emotions continue to be felt anyway. That is, unless of course we squash our painful emotions, deny them or suppress them - by withholding what is going on for us and not expressing the associated feelings. The long term effect of doing this is well documented. It can lead to mental and physical disease within the body or mind and in my view is largely unnecessary.
Conflict resolution does not need to be as difficult as we think. Particularly when we take into consideration that conflict arises from some rather natural and fundamental causes and once these causes are seen for what they are, the conflict can be often just be dropped.
These are what I see as four fundamental keys to success with resolving conflict, and HOW these elements are used in creating and effective dialogue between two people in conflict makes ALL the difference.
It is the HOW that often requires some understanding, training
and /or support by a skilled facilitator mediator - as even with the best of intentions to use these elements, conflict
can still result if these elements are not used appropriately.
Conflict resolution - mediation by an independent party has helped many people in conflict situations including couples on the brink of separation.
The mediation process can sometime involve initial one on one meetings followed by a joint meeting but when I work with a couple, I like to bring them together right from the first meeting so we can explore the dynamic that is causing the problem.
If you'd like to talk with someone about your situation you can call me on
Or you can book a personal session by clicking here
If you'd like to develop some skills to support you and your partner in intimate relationship develop your own conflict resolution skills and you don't think you need a mediator or facilitator then I invite you to consider the Relating to Connect program.