Most often our relationships are defined by our automatic patterns of interacting.
This is not how it has to be.
I believe that, with a little support and guidance, it is possible for everyone to improve their relationships significantly!
I have my own experience to prove it.
Using the tools I now teach, I have learned to respond in a conscious way rather than reacting and creating drama as I had done many times before, to great personal cost to me and those around me.
If you are here, I'm guessing you'd like a better way...
You may be feeling some
disappointment, tentative, unsure, maybe even a little embarrassed that
you are here.
My name is Alistair McKinnon, and my invitation to you is to come along to my next program, Relating to Connect (a training in Compassionate Nonviolent Communication NVC), or you can book a session with me to explore a way forward with you and your partner. Click here now if you want to book a session.
If you are in need of support with resolving an immediate conflict click here.
The science is in. Empirical studies over the last forty years have shown that the key to sustainable intimate relationships is emotional responsiveness. We are wired to want "a loved one who can offer reliable emotional connection and comfort".
The quote above is from Dr Susan Johnston who has been the leading researcher in the area of couples work. She developed Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy (EFCT) and found through her research in the last 15 years, that using her approach, 70-75% of couples recover from distress and are happy in with each other.
In my own experience, what is also very significant in developing sustainable and enriching connection with someone we love, is our ability to communicate in ways that support connection. Sounds obvious doesn't it!
I had no idea that the communication skills I learned from my parents actually created more disconnection (than connection) with my intimate partner. I suspect I am not alone. It seems that the evidence continues to point to consistently high rates of divorce in our culture.
What I found is that learning a few basic communication skills absolutely changed the quality of how I relate to my intimate partner.
In the work that I do, I support couples to create loving connection by bringing together the simple framework of EFCT, a knowledge of 'Compassionate Nonviolent Communication' as taught by Dr Marshall Rosenberg PhD, some very powerful tools for inquiry including 'the work' of Byron Katie, 'Inner Relationship Focusing' by Gene Gendlin and Ann Weiser Cornell, and a conscious aware presence that holds a very safe space for those I work with.
My invitation is for you to call me with questions on
(+61) 0412 98 88 44 or, book an initial consultation in person or via Skype by clicking here.
Alternatively, register for one of my up coming programs:
I'm Alistair McKinnon. I've been facilitating personal growth work for 20 years in group programs and one on one. I love what I do... helping couples develop loving healthy relationships.
I invite you to contact me via phone, using the website or to sign up to the "Keys to Connection" newsletter for valuable tips on building the relationship you want.
"I found the 'Essential Relating' program to be incredibly insightful and enriching. It opened my eyes to old and new ways of communicating with others. It gave me strategies for connecting with myself and others through the heart.
I felt Alistair gave plenty of opportunity and space for all participants to voice what was alive for them whatever needed voice during our sessions. He expressed a general openness to hearing whatever came up. He showed an acceptance without judgment and created a safe atmosphere for genuine expression."